Guide:  How to FLIRT

When you flirt you are conveying to others that you are a fun loving person and that you are open to looking for someone who is too.  It is a form of expression that conveys your interest in that person.  Although Dating Services  helps you to find the right person, it is still your skill that makes or breaks a relationship.   There are some simple suggestions that will help you develop and, in a short period of time,  become an expert on flirting.

Flirting is not all about sex.   Most of the time flirting is not more than showing your specific interest in the other person by giving more attention.  A simple smile indicates that you are friendly.   Yes, flirting can have sexual overtones and be overly expressive, but usually that kind of suggestive flirting gets you that more casual relationship.  But serious flirting can lead to a satisfying relationship.  Even during marriage,  the couple that flirts with each other tend to keep their relationship alive and full of fun and love. 

                  BASIC FLIRTING TIPS 

No matter what you are looking for in a person, a  few minutes of letting go and expressing yourself will open the doors to that person who may have an interest in you but may be too shy.  Flirting takes on many forms and here are some of them.

               1. First and foremost, this  is the easiest one:   A smile!!!   It's very simple to do and usually invites a return smile.  Think about the times you have initiated a smile.  What was the results?   In most cases, you received a smile back.  If the person didn't respond, then that person probably wasn't worth your time.  A smile is just simply a way to illicit a response.  Perhaps, you don't consider a smile flirting, but based on feedback, most people consider it a form a flirting.   A warm smile is a way of saying, "Hi, I would like to get to know you better".

Yes, you can smile via e-mail and while you visit internet chat rooms!  Technology has vastly changed the way relationships are formed.   Characters and symbols can express the way we feel.    It's easy to flirt someone online without inhibitions. In fact,  it is  probably easier to find out about someone's personality without the barriers of the face-to-face meeting.  BUT.......unfortunately, there are pitfalls to online flirting.  The other person may not be telling you the truth. I know many people don’t think you can flirt online but online via e-mail or chat make it easy.   Its very easy to do do and to so some without any inhabitation.   Flirting is conveying a message to someone else about your interest.  

A good old-fashioned smile is the best way to get the attention of the person you have an interest in.  If you smile at someone and they smile back, then viola, you've communicated and opened the door to the next step.  It might not be long before you'll be sharing your first kiss!!   So...........be sure to smile!

            2.  Sense of humor!     How many times have you been at a dull party or social gathering,  then someone with a sense a humor comes along and seems to   attract the attention of others.   You're thinking, finally, a bright spot in the room.  A sense of humor can go a long way when it comes to flirting and attracting someone.   People are attracted to those who are confident enough to make someone laugh.  It brings out the happy side in you.   A few funny lines will do the trick and help get the sparks flying.   Light hearted humor is the best until you establish a more meaningful relationship.   As with any flirting gestures,  don't overdo it.  A little chuckle here and there will work wonders.   It opens the way to further conversation and to gain trust in that person.  It is a great way to show you have more than one side to you.

          3.      Eye contact.   Make eye contact for more than a few seconds.  They say the eyes are the windows to your soul.   Looking into someone's eyes is a way to tell that person you are interest in them.  If they return the look, then you have connected.  Now add that smile!   Presto, you are on your way. 

            4.      Touching and getting close.    Touching the hand softly is a way to say I like you.   Pay attention to the way the person responds.  If your touch is received positively,  then continue with the subtleness.  Placing your hand on a shoulder or neck, may show that you are very interested in him or her.  The person's reaction will tell you how much they do or do not like it.  Be perceptive!   Being close in proximity may even encourage that first kiss.

          5.      Scents to remember.    Aaaaaahhhhh......yes,  that wonderful fragrance.   Can you count the times when a person walks by with a scent that just grabs your attention or when you are in room and the scent just perks up your senses???    Yes, scents can work both ways, good and bad.   Wearing a fragrance can be the one thing that points to you, opening the way to conversing with that special someone.   That inviting aroma makes those senses come alive and romance is in the air!

           6.    Appearance.   What does your appearance have to do with flirting?  A lot!  It is a form of expressing yourself and communicates your intention.  It conveys something about your personality.  Are you a slum lord?   A business associate?    A prom queen or king?    What you wear says a lot about you.    Do you take the time to dress up to the occasion?   If you don't take the interest in yourself,  then how do you expect others to?    When dating,  do that little extra to attract that special someone.   Put all the above hints together and you'll surely have something to offer. 

          7.   Teasing vs Flirting???     If you are ready to proceed past the basic flirting, then teasing is your next challenge.   Flirting initiates the relationship, while teasing takes it to the next level,  provoking curiosity.  Teasing can be intriguing to some and more of a sexual connotation to others.  For a woman,  wearing something that may show some cleavage may get you some welcome glances.  For a man,  a few open buttons or a soft shirt certainly draws the attention.   Teasing could also take the form of foreplay and to excite your partner as to what may come or it could be as simple as a good night kiss bringing wonderment to the next day.  A well played out tease will bring the desired results you are looking for.  

Now,  ready for the face to face date?  

        Bring a small gift; a special card, a flower, a box of candy, movie passes,  etc.   Use the basic flirting techniques listed above.   Always be aware of the person's responses.  It is a way of getting to know that person better.  You may discover that this is the person for you or one that you just can't be compatible with.  Isn't that what dating is all about?   Online Dating Services will get you started.  Flirting is about getting the other person's attention and the number or ways are almost limitless.   So enjoy flirting and all the possibilities that it brings to you. 

WHEN NOT TO FLIRT:

Never flirt with someone else when you are out on a date.  It is not polite and it is just not cool.

Never flirt with someone if you are married unless it is your spouse.  Being nice is fine flirting is not. Remember you are not available.

Never  flirt with someone you already don’t like.  It can be hurtful. 

Never flirt with an ex unless you want to restart that relationship.  That include just calling that person.

Never take advantage of a flirt if the other person had too much to drink.

Never flirt when you are dancing with someone else.   Keep your eyes on your partner.  Flirt with your partner!  Drift into each other's arms and make your dance special.    

Rremember!!!  Flirting sends a single to the person that you are interested.  Know your boundaries.  Use it as an effective tool to get the attention of that person with whom you feel there is a possibility of a relationship with.  So go have fun and join several dating services and bring some new enjoyment to your life.

Author: D. Casey